Before I put this off yet another day that turns into another week, month...

It's just slipping so fast. And all of the little nuances that life offers keep me so busy sometimes I don't just be, and soak up what is good in life. And it is so easy to focus on what isn't. And those things aren't going away anytime soon. But, my children are changing oh so much lately.

I think especially now, since little guy has turned TWO!, he is just a completely different kid. And he's hilarious. And he's oh! so snugly. And he makes my heart melt over and over again, only as much as he makes me question my ability to stay at home and maintain any sense of sanity. Because as I've said before, I just never had to deal with the difficulty that often comes with this age with Holland. And, I just chalked it up to being such a fantastic mama. HA! Now, I realize that I have two kids that both bring equal parts overwhelming delight and utter frustration. But, I'm here. And they are little people that love me so much and need me for their everything. And I want more than anything to be that. So, I realize that each day with have some amazing highlights and times that make my heart complete, and then there will be moments of complete chaos that make me want to scream and then run outside. But, I won't. We'll work through the minor instance and then shortly, we'll all be laughing and skipping together.

Now for the specifics, I'll be yearning for five years (or shorter!) from now... I can't even believe how incredibly reflective and wise my sweet girl is. Lately she has voiced way too much concern about growing up. I can't recall all of the recent conversations, but one that comes to mind, "Mom I know that Maryanne (her good friend, who just turned 4) is cuter than me." Me "You are both amazing girls, why do you think that?" H: "Because she's younger than me. And everyone likes kids that are younger more. And I'm going to get older first. And then I'm going to be a mom and just have to work all day long, like you. " Where did that come from?! But, she's so smart. And she understands so much. And I love how she randomly tells me that she loves me. And I love how nothing makes her more happy than for her and I to sing a conversation back and forth. And I love that tonight after going to Trader Joe's, she grabbed my hand in the parking lot and insisted we skip together to the van. She's an amazing kid. And sometimes her emotions rise to the top so very fast, but she's five. And what may seem like such a little thing to me is incredibly huge to her. But, that's being five. And I'll enjoy her, emotions and all, because before I blink, she will be six.

And oh, my sweet and crazy boy... He is so attached to me. And I inwardly just love that. He stopped nursing a few weeks ago, after I left town for four nights. And I didn't think he would ever be keen to that. But, he didn't even ask. He just became even more attached to me. And so we have replaced nursing with so many cuddles. And when he is feeling like his cup is nearing empty, he comes to my legs and asks to be held and then just digs into my neck like it is going away. I. Love. That. And there are times that I'm frantically trying to get out of the house and I just don't have the time, and he NEEDS me to just stop. And hold him. But, for whatever reason, I can't. And the poor, sweet boy just loses it. He's screaming and yelling and telling me in his best vocabulary (which totally gets his point across these days...) to just hold him and love him. And in retrospect, I just need to as often as I can. There are some times, when I do need to get out the door to work, or somewhere else that won't wait, but I just need to remind myself that "babies don't keep"...

I had attempted to make a blog entry a few weeks before T's 2nd birthday on my phone. For whatever reason (most likely, it was too long!), it never posted. But, at the time we had been moderately concerned that Talin's vocabulary was on the lower end of the "normal" spectrum. Then I read that it was average for a kid turning two to have a vocab of 80 words. So, I started to jot them all down. And he was way past! And that was a few weeks before he turned two... Since then- oh my! He can and does say pretty much anything! He is stringing words together all the time. Tonight, the screen saver, that is a slideshow of my pictures, came on a picture of T as a 4ish month baby came on. I said, "That is you as a little baby!" And Talin says, " I baby! I cute!" And he was. And he is!